The Light Beyond

Making and understanding a Last Will And Testament

Although what you are about to read is fictitious, it comprises a legal will in the United States. This type of Last Will and Testament is prepared by an attorney; it is then signed in the attorney's office and sealed by a notary public. The witnesses to the will cannot be anyone who stands to benefit from the will, such as a spouse or child. This type of will is usually stored in the testator's safe deposit box or kept in the attorney's office for safekeeping.

Wasted Youth campaign against suicide

In the Times newspaper recently, I was reading about a subject dear to my heart - the prevention of suicide. It's a UK charity called Wasted Youth and was set up by Daniel Fulvio to encourage young men to talk about their problems, after his younger brother killed himself on Christmas Eve 2006. "Suicide is the biggest single killer of young men, more than car accidents, more than drug abuse," he said. "There's this horrific ingrained assumption amongst young men that being silent is strong but it's dangerous and damaging and that's what I want to change."

"Steven's death was just an utter shock to everyone. He left no clue and no one knows why he did it. It eats away at all of us and it always will." Daniel's charity organized a series of concerts to raise funds in conjunction with charities already active in the field, including the Campaign Against Living Miserably; visit www.thecalmzone.net.

Requiem for a rabbit

From the ever-wonderful Michael Neill: Just before I boarded the flight back to LA this morning, I got a call from my wife with some news - our rabbit, Biggie Tupac Jr. (he was a hip-hop bunny) was attacked in the garden in the night by some wild animal or another and died.  The kids were crying in the background, and after a few quick words with my five year old daughter, who proudly assured me that they were all sad, even her, I strapped in to my seat and switched off my phone.

All flight long I've been wondering about what to say to them when I get home.  Do I commiserate with their sorrow and agree that this is terrible, awful and bad? Truth be known, I was never a huge fan of the rabbit, but I certainly don't think his was a pleasant demise.

Do I help apportion blame?

Do I trot out the "death is a natural part of life" speech in hopes that somehow they'll just "get over it"?

Do I run out and buy them a new rabbit, in a "please don't be sad I can't stand it if you're sad I want us all to be happy, happy, happy" kind of way?

After several hours of contemplation at 30,000 feet, I've concluded the real questions is less what I will ultimately do or not do than why I would be doing it.  If I think my kids' beautiful, delicate souls can't handle the realities of a sometimes harsh and hostile world, I will look for ways of "making it all OK".  If I think my kids need to toughen up and prepare themselves for the realities of life and death, I will show little empathy for their sorrow and make sure they know that "people (and rabbits) die - that's just the way it is."

But the reality is, I think my kids are capable and able and wise beyond their years.  (I also think this is true of you, and your partner, and your parents, and your kids, and even your cousin Bob who's always seemed a bit hopeless - but more on that later.)